Wicked Wednesday - what do you as readers want?

It feels like it's been a long while since we've had a Wicked Wednesday post, hasn't it? September was a busy month, and October is going to be even busier with The 13th Floor Collection blog tour. November and December will be a break time except for a few special events. I need to get working on what comes next now that my series is done.

I want to revise and query one of my unpublished novels. I considered a sci-fi or dystopian, but I don't think I'm quite ready to delve back into those yet. My focus is still on the paranormal romances. I have three options I'm considering. I'd appreciate your opinion. What catches your interest as a reader?

1) WITCH'S FIRST RULE. This is the first book in a completed trilogy. Before my son was born, I queried this book, and it got some interest, but eventually, everyone passed on it. I realized I was marketing it all wrong. I also did some major rewrites. The protagonist is a witch and professional marriage therapist named Magena Silver. She uses love potions to reignite the passion in broken marriages and boost her success rating. Magena has been with me for several years. Every time I take a break from her story, I eventually find myself coming back to her. Magena is strong, opinionated, and in charge of her life. She doesn't like it when I ignore her.
Overall story: A powerful witch demands Magena reverse the effects of a love potion on two of her clients. She must create an antidote or lose her life.
Romantic plot: Nathan is an empath sent to watch over Magena as she tries to create the antidote. He's the only man that has ever been able to get past her emotionally cool facade.

2) SUPER FAMOUS. This was my NaNoWriMo book from last year. It's a superhero romance. I thought it was a bit silly at the time I was writing it, but I've recently read it again, and I liked it a lot. It would need a lot of revising, but it could work. Oakley a.k.a. The Silver Skipper is the leader of a group of superheroes. They're on the rise to international fame. Unfortunately this draws the attention of some scary super villains. With super crime increasing, the government is cracking down on all people with superpowers including the heroes. The heroes are forbidden to use their powers lest they become criminals too.
Overall story: Oakley and her team risk their freedom and lives to save the innocent as the villains kidnap children with superpowers.
Romantic plot: Oakley is the ultimate superhero and never lets her guard down, but Benniton sees her more than just as The Silver Skipper.

3) SORROW PHAGE. (That's only the working title.) This is a paranormal romance where the protagonist works at a supernatural funeral home. Hey, paranormal beings can die too. Erinys is a demon that feeds on people's sorrow. See, it's handy she works at a funeral home! A new and gorgeous vampire wakes up in the mortuary, and she finds herself tangled up in a whole load of trouble.
Overall story: Supernatural drug war reveals itself as something much more horrifying, and Erinys is caught in the middle of it.
Romantic plot: Erinys helps a new vampire named Nicholas and starts to fall for him even when he brings death to her door.

If only I could write better taglines! So what do you think? What catches your attention?

The Lucky 7 MeMe and the Sunshine Award

I received this cool meme from Tara Tyler and Tania Walsh.

Thank you! This is really neat.

Here are the rules:

1. Go to page 77 of your current MS.
2. Go to line 7.
3. Copy down the next 7 lines - sentences or paragraphs - and post them as they're written. No cheating.
4. Tag 7 authors.

Here are my seven lines from Witch's First Rule:

“She didn't say why she wanted it, but I'm going to assume it's because she doesn't want me making the potion.” Magena hurried through the kitchen and down the hall to go up the stairs to the second floor. The vacuum was sitting by the linen closet still plugged into the wall. She smacked the handle as she stormed by and knocked it on its back. “My home has been violated. It'll never feel right again.”

Nathan kept pace with her. “I'm going to have to call Mr. Knox and tell him what happened. I'm sure he can help you cleanse the house if you feel something wrong with it. There's no use--”

(I didn't cheat, but likely the scene will be cut from the manuscript!)

Here are the next lucky seven writers:

1. WritingNut

2. M Pepper Langlinais

3. Cherie Reich

4. Aubrie Dionne

5. Lorelei

6. Sarah Ahiers

7. Julie Dao

I also received this wonderful award from Kathleen at Writing, Reading and Life.

Thank you for a bit of sunshine on a rainy day.

Here are the rules:

1. Thanks the person who gave it to you.

2. Write a blog post with the answers to the questions.

3. Nominate 10 other bloggers for the award.

Favorite color: blue

Favorite animal: wolf

Favorite number: 5

Favorite non-alcoholic drink: pink lemonade

Facebook or Twitter: Facebook.

My passions: My son, husband, reading, and, of course, writing. There's also chocolate. Most particularly chocolate chip cookies and chocolate cheesecake. Mmmm.

Getting or giving presents: giving. I love the reactions and they stay with me longer than any material thing a person can give me.

Favorite pattern: whorls

Favorite day of the week: Saturday

Favorite flower: wildflowers. I love seeing a field full of various wildflowers. I'm not a fan of flowers in the house.

I'm giving some sunshine to everyone who wants it. Have a great weekend!

Favorite Character Blogfest

Thank you to Laura Josephsen for hosting this great blogfest. It's so much fun! Here are the rules:

1. Decide which of your characters you'd like to introduce everyone to, and choose a snippet about this character (preferably no more than 200 words) to share about this character. 

2. Between January 23-25, tell us who your favorite character you've written is and why, and post your snippet.

3. Hop around to other participants to check out their favorite characters and a bit of their story.

The lovely Melanie Billings, Acquisitions Editor at Whiskey Creek Press, has graciously offered to supply critiques as prizes! Winners will be drawn from the list of active participants after midnight on the 25th and announced on my blog on the 26th.

1st Prize: critique of first 15 pages of your manuscript, an e-book copy of my book, Confessions from the Realm of the Underworld (Also Known as High School) and an ARC e-copy of my next book, Rising Book 1: Resistance (upcoming publication in February 2012).

2nd Prize: critique of first 10 pages of your manuscript and an e-book copy of Confessions from the Realm of the Underworld (Also Known as High School).

3rd Prize: critique of first 5 pages of your manuscript.

Here's my entry: 

My favorite character is Magena Silver, celebrity therapist and witch. She's the protagonist in Witch' s First Rule (the first book in a paranormal romance trilogy). Magena is intelligent, sexy, and career-minded.  Imagine a 30-year-old Catherine Zeta-Jones in professional clothes tailored to hug her lovely curves. She gives her clients love potions to re-ignite their passion and boost her success rating. Nothing is going to get in the way of getting what she wants. Not even love. Well, nothing gets in the way until she gives a love potion to the wrong people, her life is threatened, and she meets a gorgeous man who can feel her powerful emotions behind her cool therapist mask.

I don't want to hurt the feelings of my other characters, but Magena's been with me for a long time. I love to write strong women. Not just physical or supernatural strength, but ones with an iron will and clear mind. Magena knows what she wants and how to achieve her goals. She is determined and aggressive in all areas of her life. Underneath that strength, she's hiding herself from love. She's afraid of being seen as weak. I like writing a protagonist who seemingly has her act together, but her hidden flaws are massive. Part of the challenge for me is coming up with a story that can unveil those flaws and make her face them.

Here's a snippet from Witch's First Rule:

“Yes, I have-” Nathan cut himself off and looked at her. “He sent you blood? Whose blood?”

“You're just here to supervise. If Mr. Knox didn't tell you, you don't need to know.” Magena kept her eyes upon the road. A smirk played over her lips.

“What are you using it for? I know you're a witch. He did mention that much.”

“I'm making a potion,” she replied with a small shrug.

Nathan reached into one of his pockets and took out a tiny red vial. He held it up and asked his question again. “Whose blood is it and what sort of potion are you making?”

She smirked and made a left turn into her neighborhood. “Are you worried it's your blood?”

“F*ck, yes!” He opened the window and stuck his hand out with the vial in it. “Tell me whose blood it is or I'll drop it.”

“No, you won't.”

He shook the vial, letting it dangle from his fingers. “I'll drop it.”

Magena glanced at him, wearing the calm expression she put on her for clients. “You won't drop it because then you'll have to explain to Mr. Knox what happened to the most important component of the elixir. I don't know how easy it was for him to obtain it, but I'm sure he would not be pleased at all.”

Wicked Wednesday - Witch's First Rule

I've talked about a lot about the different aspects of how to market paranormal romances. I've been asked a few times to use examples from my own work. Here we go. It's time to put all those tips and research to work.

I'm going to use a novel that has gotten a lot of attention from agents and publishers, but somehow, I never make the sale. Why? I've been marketing it all wrong.

It's taken me a long time to realize why I couldn't sell it. I was too close to the story. I took a break from it to work on a few other manuscripts and now I see it with fresh eyes. It surprises me how much I've changed and how I've grown as a writer. How could I have thought what I was doing was the right way? I have a particular love-hate relationship with the protagonist, Magena Silver. She's been with me for a number of years. We know each other well. Perhaps too well. She likes to get her way and knows how to manipulate me, but her way isn't always the right way.

The first issue: the title. The book was originally called Alchemy. I was very attached to the title, but it doesn't speak to a paranormal romance audience. It's plain. It doesn't have any character. It could be a "How To" book for what anyone could guess from the title alone.

The new title: Witch's First Rule. This says a lot more. Saying "witch" allows the potential reader to know what they're dealing with. It's a paranormal. It has something to do with rules. The twist is it's not rules of magic, but Magena's rules of dating. It'll make the potential reader curious to find out what this first rule is. It's also a play on the title of a famous fantasy novel by Terry Goodkind.

I sent a query letter out to several agents and publishers. One in seven responded with interest and asked to see the full manuscript. Each time it was rejected. It wasn't what they were looking for. So what did they see in my query letter - particularly the blurb - that led them to believe it was something else?

Here's the old blurb: Magena Silver is a professional celebrity and a witch. She's the most successful marriage therapist in America because she secretly slips love potions to her clients. In Alchemy, she helps one couple and it turns out to be a grave mistake.  The father of the wife is a powerful witch – a Master - and he wants Magena to make an antidote or else he will kill her.  Magena fails to make one and must discover another way to defeat the Master with the help of her companions.  She is caught up in an ancient battle between two powerful families and must deal with a lovesick gypsy as well as her attraction to the handsome empath the Master has sent to watch her.

Not hot. Not quirky. None of Magena's personality in it. It attracted attention, though. Were they hoping for a lot of magic? Witch fights? Alchemist details? There isn't a lot of magic. There's fighting, but it's not the focus of the story. There's very little details about alchemy. It's about people and relationships. It's a paranormal, but the romance drama trumps it all.

It has the main character and the conflict, but not in a way that best markets them. It has a hook, but it's not as powerful as it could be. It needs to show just how unique this book is compared to other paranormal romances. It's fast-paced and hot, but the blurb definitely doesn't mirror this. There's mounting tension, but even I'm not drawn in by that part and I love the story.

I'm trying to compose a new blurb, but I can't get it right.

The new hook: Magena Silver's first rule of dating: don't get emotionally attached.
OR  The first rule of dating Magena Silver: don't get emotionally attached.

Yes, she breaks her rules. I think this hook works more efficiently than the previous one. Yet I'd still like to say she's a professional celebrity and a witch. I need to set up the paranormal feel and the conflict. This is tricky.

Slipping her clients potent love potions has brought Magena great success as a celebrity therapist and a witch until now.

Hm, that needs work. Yet it has what I want in it. Should I go the romance route first?

As a celebrity therapist and a witch, Magena's career comes first until Nathan Linwood saunters into her office.

Mmm, I do like imagining that man do anything.

What do you think? Paranormal conflict first or the romantic conflict?