TEAM SANTA
By Christine Rains
"Team
CA-23 is a go!”
The fat man wiggled and
slithered down the chimney as if boneless. He popped out of the
fireplace with a merry laugh. A puff of soot surrounded him and
transformed to sparkling dust as it drifted to the floor.
Bobbo the cat started out of
his nap and hissed. His gray fur stood on end and his claws dug into
the couch cushion. He raced behind the sofa in a flurry of hairballs.
From the sleigh on the roof,
an elf in a green cap flipped a switch for the camera. “CA-23 entry
successful.”
The radio response was crisp
as the new fallen snow. “Roger that, CA-23. How's he looking,
Evert?”
“Doing
good. No chimney damage. He's placing the presents under the tree
right now.” Evert leaned back, breathing in the cold night air. The
images on the screen bobbed as Santa bent and set the many gifts out
for the large family of six. “I think we got this one right.”
"Let's
hope. Finn's still trying to repair the roof from CA-22's mishap.”
“The
mishap was letting Finn pilot anything.” Evert snorted. “But
since his father has more stripes on his cane than the rest of us, he
gets to do what he wants.”
Santa nabbed a sugar cookie
from a plate and stuffed it in his mouth. He hummed and chewed as he
started on the stockings. His beard caught the crumbs and sifted them
out to appear on the empty plate.
"At
least he made Finn do the repairs himself. Maybe he won't ask for his
own team next year.”
Evert chuckled. “Yeah, let
him stick with cleaning up after the reindeer.”
As if he'd heard the joke,
Santa's belly jiggled as he giggled and packed the treats into the
last stocking. He then continued to stick stuffers into a nearby vase
and potpourii dish.
"Crap.”
Evert straightened and pressed a few buttons on the dashboard. With
no response from Santa, he tried another set. “Hugo, we have a
stuffing problem.”
Santa moved on to the chair,
ripping open a pillow and filling it with gifts.
"Dammit.”
Hugo let loose a colorful string of curses. “What's he doing?”
"Just
stuffed some pillows. Moving on to a potted plant.” Evert's fingers
danced over the controls.
Dirt and leaves splatted
against the wallpaper.
"Have
you tried telling him his job is complete? Or the adult out-of-sight
escape command?”
"Both.
He's not responding to either. It keeps saying his work is in
progress.” Evert growled and hit a fist on the screen. “Come on,
Santa. You're done!”
Santa bent and reached down to
pick up something.
"The
cat! He's going to stuff the cat!” Evert sent the commands again as
Hugo frantically yelled over the radio.
Bobbo screeched and kicked,
but the gloved hand had a firm hold of him. The other hand raised up,
full of peppermints and chocolates wrapped in shiny red paper.
Evert slapped his hand on a
large red button. The gleam in Santa's eyes blinked out, and he fell
backward on the coffee table. The cat tore free and raced out of the
room.
"Situation
averted.” Evert groaned and rested his head against the screen.
“CA-23 has been shut down.”
"Roger
that.” Hugo sighed. “Clean up. A replacement is already on his
way.”
A cold wind kicked up the snow
and sent it spiraling upwards. The reindeer stomped impatiently.
Evert could sympathize. When Santa had been alive, it had never been
like this. Deliveries were made quickly and efficiently. No good
child was ever forgotten.
"What
make? Please tell me it's one of the Mistletoe line. At least the
only bug they've exhibited is kissing too many surprised mothers.”
"Nope,
the closet available is one of the Snowman clones.” Hugo
replied, the apology clear in his tone.
"Great.”
Evert grumbled and slid out of his comfortable seat. “He better
finish our route before he melts. Team CA-23 leaving the sleigh for
clean-up.”
END