7 Tips on Surviving a Horror Story
by Cherie Reich
1. Never split up.
The first one to split from the group is almost always the first to die.
2. Phones are bad.
They never work when you want them to, and when they do work, it’s usually a way for the killer to get you right where he wants you.
3. Never look back.
Run, run, run and never, ever look back. You’re more likely to trip and die, if you do look back.
4. Off with its head!
There aren’t too many monsters out there, except hydras, that can live or grow stronger without their heads. So chop away!
5. Don’t live in small towns, forests, or near cornfields.
They’re crawling with monsters and aliens.
6. Don’t laugh at guys with chainsaws.
This one is from personal experience. No one likes to be laughed at, and it’s more dangerous to do so when the person has a chainsaw.
7. Romance will get you killed.
Whether it’s a one night stand or a romantic tryst with your beau, it’s better to be single in a horror story. Romance (or sex) clouds your judgment and makes you great monster bait.
What’s your favorite tip on surviving a horror story?
A monster hunts us. After hibernating for a decade, it’s ravenous. We long to stop this nightmare, but the end of the road is far. There is no waking up once a legend sets its sights on you.
Disappearances every ten or so years make little impact on the small town of New Haven, Virginia. Hikers get lost. Hunters lose the trail. Even when a body is discovered, the inhabitants’ memories last about as long as the newspaper articles.
No one connects the cases. No one notices the disappearances go back beyond Civil War times. No one believes a legendary monster roams the forests in Southwestern Virginia.
I don’t either until the truck breaks down on an old mountain trail. Cell phones won’t work in this neck of the woods. It’s amazing how much a person can see by starlight alone. So what if we can’t feel our fingers or toes as we hike toward the main road. How many more miles left to go?
Hear that noise?
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